With Lucy Liu as Watson, it’s safe to assume that Sherlock and Watson will end up fucking each other, and no one wants to see that, do they?

Based on the memoir ‘A True Story,’ comes A True Story. It’s based on a true story, by the way

The English-language debut of Swedish thriller director Daniel Espinosa is a “high-octane”, “intense”, “no holds barred” (delete as appropriate) maelstrom of secrets, spies and badly edited fight scenes. The cast is fine and it’s always nice to go back to South Africa (fokken prawns!), but surely we’ve outgrown two hour gunfights interspersed with trash talk?

Ever wanted to watch your favourite films in a warehouse space made out of reclaimed waste materials? Well, you can from 29th February. Thank God it’s Monday!

Not that anyone noticed, but the Oscars weren’t the only Film Awards Ceremony happening in Hollywood over the weekend.

If* we ever build a time machine, Adam, we’re going back to 1966 to kick your mum in the stomach. *When

Ryan Seacrest’s jacket loses out big time.

Oh guess what, it’s time for another Katherine Heigl film to come out. Why? Because you touch yourself. It’s One For The Money day, and the only rational response is to drink until you don’t have a mouth anymore. Have we seen the film yet? That’s hardly the point.

Hands up if you think this whole thing has been orchestrated?

No, really, there’s actual electric stuff in it. Like a LIGHTNING BOLT