What do you know about Kristin Scott Thomas? Exactly. She’s beautiful and French (except she isn’t, but you know) and she plays lots of tragic heroines and frigid upper-class women and generally people who look down their nose at the world until they suddenly have all the sex. If that’s it, you need this Cheat Sheet like KST needs a genteel chignon (clue: a lot)

We were going to say ‘in talks with The Counselor’, but it sounded a bit meta.

Yippee ki-Jai?

Oh my flipping flopping flange, the OWLs are a year old! This is momentous. We’d love to throw our weekly citrus opinion-fest a more fitting party, but unfortunately 2012 has so far been the year of totally crap films. Still, things are bound to pick up – and until they do, you need our help more than ever…

OOH SO DARK

*nerdgasm*

Although Christopher Nolan’s third and final Batman film, The Dark Knight Rises, won’t be on our screens until next July, it looks as if Warner Brothers are seeking to replicate the huge success of its predecessor’s viral advertising campaign. It all starts here… but what does any of it mean? And who is Dr Leonid Pavel?

A prequel to John Carpenter’s 1982 remake of 1951’s The Thing from Another World, The Thing should by all reasoning have been even more offensive than the thing you last picked from the sole of your shoe. In actual fact, Matthijs van Heijningen Jr’s film is an uninspired but grotesquely effective prelude to a genre classic. Or something.

All You Need Is Kill. Really.

It’s not often you get an All-American Sports Movie that celebrates the joys of cold, clinical science over fuzzy, intangible human emotion, but then Moneyball isn’t exactly your average sports movie. The true story of a baseball squad that defeated the odds by taking emotion out of the game, Moneyball combines the frankly terrifying talents of Bennett Miller, Aaron Sorkin, Steven Zaillian and Brad Pitt; expertly demonstrating the true potential of a perfectly constructed team.