This is what happens when people keep writing young adult novels.

Sigourney Weaver is back on our screens this week with Red Lights, her third dismal thriller in under a year. But there’s more than guns and Cillian Murphy to the Queen of Sci-Fi, the woman credited with finally bringing gender balance to the Force from Ghostbusters to Avatar. Oh, and did you know she’s part of a club that includes Jamie Foxx, Emma Thompson and Al Pacino? It’s Cheat Sheet o’clock!

The English-language debut of Swedish thriller director Daniel Espinosa is a “high-octane”, “intense”, “no holds barred” (delete as appropriate) maelstrom of secrets, spies and badly edited fight scenes. The cast is fine and it’s always nice to go back to South Africa (fokken prawns!), but surely we’ve outgrown two hour gunfights interspersed with trash talk?

If* we ever build a time machine, Adam, we’re going back to 1966 to kick your mum in the stomach. *When

She’s playing Spindly

Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 is out this Friday. SCREAM SCREAM SWOONY DREAMZ OMFG ZZZZZ3333. Everyone is going to poop when they see this film. In honour of it coming into the world like a screaming demon baby that claws its way out, bloodied and howling, from the ruins of its mothers womb, BFF have compiled a list of the Top 10 Worst Films that the Cast of Twilight Had A Hand In. Or: the Top Ten Films Cursed by Twilight. Enjoy.

Don’t worry, Kristen Stewart doesn’t say anything in it.

We may have inserted those quotation marks for funsies.

Did you feel a breeze? That was the unanimous sighs of us here at BFF Towers…

HAMMER! Wait, who?