It’s Minority Report + Mad Max + Wall-E + Tom Cruise Shouting At Things – Oblivion looks great!
With the teaser trailer for Star Trek Into Darkness finally out, let’s look back at one of the most successful reboots of one of the most successful franchises in history. No one could have predicted how good J.J. Abrams would make Star Trek. For our tribute, let us drink as if we’ve just failed the Kobayashi Maru for the 10th time!
A thoroughly unnecessary and totally uncalled-for reboot of the Morgan Freeman-led Alex Cross films unites mediocre director Rob Cohen with the flop magnet that is the actor/director/screenwriter/producer/general nuisance Tyler Perry. A clumsy, forced script, an inexplicable central plot, and muddled direction makes Alex Cross a flamboyant train-wreck where the mangled carcasses of a buddy movie, a cop caper, and a psychological thriller are barely distinguishable.
After an award-laden 45 years in front of the camera, Hollywood heavyweight Dustin Hoffman makes his directorial debut right here in Blighty with this eager-to-please septuagenarian backstage comedy. And as if that wasn’t excitement enough, Quartet features an illustrious cast of British acting royalty, including one Dame, two Sirs, and enough C-, O- and MBEs to make you feel like you should probably go home and have a wash. And Billy Connolly. What could possibly go wrong?
Just walk away, Elizabeth Banks. Just Walk away and there will be an end to the horror
In the jungle you must wait, til the dice read FIND ZACH HELM AND CUT OFF HIS FINGERS
Surrounded by two hunky potential lovers? Better take a prophylactic course of antibiotics, Saoirse Ronan…
Snipe London
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