It’s going to be a rom-com. That might be a lie. Tim Burton has today announced that his next project will be a stop-motion picture of The Addams Family. Kooky, creepy, dark and gothic fairytale? Tim, are you sure you want to stretch yourself this far?

Alright, alright, we get it, Burton‘s Alice In Wonderland is so frikking exciting that we’re basically all just sat weeing ourselves around the clock in preparation. As we speak, cinema..

What are you more tired of, the phrase ‘Tim Burton and Johnny Depp’ or the words ‘vampire movie’? We’re not sure either, but for better or for worse, it would appear that we’re going to be hearing a lot more of both.

Someone fetch the Tim Burton Repellent.

Frankenweenie sees Tim Burton return not only to his 1984 short-film of the same name – and not only to the stop-motion animation style he utilised on Corpse Bride – but also to the sort of smart, Gothic quasi-horror that made his name. And the results are, pleasingly, very much the Tim Burton of old.

The film of that TV series you’ve never heard of, Dark Shadows does justice to neither its cult classic source material nor the combined talents of Tim Burton and Johnny Depp. Fifty times longer than its trailer and half as enjoyable, Dark Shadows is one of the most tiresome, derivative and uninspiring movies you’re likely to see this year.

40 years have passed since Gene Wilder made possibly the best entrance in any film ever, limping out of those factory doors to stunned silence before roly-polying his way into cinematic history. So what if Roald Dahl didn’t like it? So what if Tim Burton’s version was more faithful to the original text? Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory is still an unrivalled masterpiece, and a glorious example of the musical genre. I’ll drink to that…

Remember the golden days of George Lucas? Remember when Zemeckis was coming out with hit after hit? Remember when Tim Burton didn’t just paint everything black and shove his wife into shot? We do. We present the five directors we mourn the hardest – made all the more bitter by the fact that they’re all still alive.

Along with Helena Bonham Carter. Quelle surprise, Frenchie – maybe if you actually lived with Tim Burton (you know, your HUSBAND) then he wouldn’t feel the need to cast you in every film he makes just to spend some quality time?

Tim Burton’s new animated feature is being shot in black and white, before being rendered in 3D. Old/New skool or what?