It’s been another jam-packed week here in the world of film, but we understand that you’re a busy bee and you can’t be expected to keep up with our entire news output. So here, once again, is our handy Saturday digest of the week’s top stories. It’s like time-travelling, but not nearly as good!
Finally, a co-star to match the misery of Kristen Stewart…
French film monthly Premiere has announced that Wes Anderson’s Moonrise Kingdom will be opening Cannes Film Festival 2012. To save you from having to find a French newsagent/actually read any French, here are the predicted titles that have us wishing that we could spend a week on Brangelina’s fuck-off-huge yacht…
R-Pattz’ post-Twilight breakout role is as a talentless schmoozer who drags himself up the ranks of fin de siècle Parisian society on a ladder made from other men’s wives. Visually dazzling but with no real substance, this new adaptation of an 1885 novel is as charmingly insubstantial as its lusty yet anodyne antihero. Bel ami, médiocre film.
This week, Reese stars in This Means War, a film where she forces two lifelong friends (and also… spies? Or something. I don’t know. Ask John.) to compete for her love, destroying one another in the process. Hang on a second, haven’t we seen this before? Y’know, Reese Witherspoon systematically ruining the lives of those around her? Let’s investigate.
If* we ever build a time machine, Adam, we’re going back to 1966 to kick your mum in the stomach. *When
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