One of the most distinctive horror directors working today, Ti West made his mainstream breakthrough with 2011’s critical smash The Innkeepers and his work on the headline-grabbing anthology films V/H/S and The ABCs of Death. He’s got a frankly alarming number of projects due to hit the big screen within the next couple of years, so we’ve put together this guide to his key works. Y’know, so you don’t look like a square at parties.

For about the last two years, BFF stalwart Duncan has been talking about writing a column – and, thanks to Evil Dead remaker Fede Alvarez, he’s finally pulled his finger out and done it. Abattoir Blues will be creeping out of BFF’s cellar twice a month to shine a torch into the murky corners of horror, and where better to start than with the wholly unnecessary redux of 1981’s most plant-rapey gorefest? Turn down the lights and read on…

Summer is coming, guys! It really, genuinely is – we’ve seen sunshine and weather reports and everything. But, you know, there’s no point losing your head to the season; in fact, looking at the plethora of summer movies on offer, summer is in fact the DEADLIEST time of year. Ever. So, in a bid to keep all of our loyal BFF patrons alive, here’s the top 10 things to avoid this summer – as seen in the movies…

Sam Raimi‘s cult classic Evil Dead has been controversially resurrected, but, despite a few new plot additions, director Fede Alvarez hasn’t quite managed to breath new life into the story. It has some satisfying similarities with the original – gallons of spewing blood, an integral chain saw, an evil force rushing through the forest at an ungodly pace and non-consensual tree sex – but RIP low-budget aesthetics and downright silliness, you are greatly missed.

Evil Dead is apparently amazing and worth a few more new films.

We’ve run out of gags on tree rape, but expect more of it anyway.

According to statistics, you guys just can’t get enough of scaring yourselves shitless. Always keen to please, us lovely folks at BFF have collaborated a Top 10 list of the best horror films we think will be worth crapping your pants for this year. And with Texas Chainsaw 3D thoroughly shoved under the carpet forever, we can start with some decent horrors. Sadly, Jesus Hates Zombies didn’t make the cutting. So what did?

We head back to the cabin the woods for more lecherous tree action.

Assuming the Mayans don’t bring their A-game and take out the entire world by New Year’s Eve (not likely; one thing we know about Mayans is they’re hella lazy), it will soon be 2013. And you know what that means – LOADS of shiny new 2013 films! We’ve trawled the Internet to find the Hollywood big-hitters most likely to get us going in what future generations will probably remember as 4346 in the Korean calendar. Depending on, you know, factors.

Cabin in the Words.