GET IT OUT, BRODY

There’s a TINY MAN IN HER HAIR

Her eyes are so big they can hold a gun each.

Is it just us, or is Peter Sarsgaard in ALL THE MOVIES at the moment?

In Time is any studio exec’s dream. High-concept but easily simplified sci-fi, PLUS a distinctly un-futuristic set with just one really memorable visual tag which can be dragged out for all the posters, PLUS a plot point which means you can literally cast Olivia Wilde as Justin Timberlake’s mum? Gold, all of it. And the amazing thing is, In Time could have had all these and still been good. Unfortunately, twelve thousand temporal puns do not a watchable film make.

Can we expect Donkey: The Untold Story?

So it’s official; Anne Hathway will definitely be taking on the role of Fantine in the upcoming film version of Les Misérables. If you felt a breeze just then, it would be the result of collective sighs sweeping across the nation. This seems like the perfect time to lament the top 10 roles which didn’t require Anne Hathaway, doesn’t it?

After successfully suing James Cameron for the screenplay for The Terminator, we wonder whether In Time will even reach our screens.

Oh my shit, it’s April! And it’s brought along not only Fools’ Days, sweet spring showers and the prospect of some chinless wonder marrying a Sloane, but also a batch of fresh and steaming new films – some promising, others less so. Stick around as we sift through this month’s cinematic offerings week by week and separate the fresh fish (FRESH FISH, Glen Coco!) from the distinctly murky tuna salad…

As if the first trailer-vomitus wasn’t enough to assure the free-thinking world that the cancer that is Twilight (and its associations) will inevitably defile the sanctity of all enduring traditions and literary archetypes, the second instalment of this nightmare only compounds the impending doom.