In space, no-one can hear you ask what the hell is going on

STONEY-FACE IS BACK!

In space Noomi can hear you scream.

There’s going to be a Doctor Who movie materialising in cinemas soon, most likely with that weird whoooshing sound effect. Now if they want to do this, it turns out they’re going to need an actor to play the Doctor (we were as shocked as you were). So we thought we’d give the film producers a hand, and let you all know our picks for who would make superb Doctors Whos.

Yes. Yes he could.

WHY? WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU, NICOLAS CAGE?

And we sort of know what it’s about now…but not really.

You fancy him too, right? Good.

Please be so.

Running across one hundred and thirty minutes of hammer-smashing 3D insanity, Thor is absolutely everything you want from a superhero film; big, beautiful and heroically over the top. And if the plot gets lost along the way, who really cares? On to Valhalla!