Is it just us, or is Peter Sarsgaard in ALL THE MOVIES at the moment?

In Time is any studio exec’s dream. High-concept but easily simplified sci-fi, PLUS a distinctly un-futuristic set with just one really memorable visual tag which can be dragged out for all the posters, PLUS a plot point which means you can literally cast Olivia Wilde as Justin Timberlake’s mum? Gold, all of it. And the amazing thing is, In Time could have had all these and still been good. Unfortunately, twelve thousand temporal puns do not a watchable film make.

Magic fountains activated by urine, CGI babies, toilet humour, soft porn and plenty of raucous jokes guarantee that The Change-Up will alienate most of its audience and appeal solely to the most depraved individuals amongst us.

Cowboys. Aliens. Bond. Han. Indy, for that matter. The guy who made Iron Man. The guy who made Iron Man 2. (They’re the same guy, FYI.) COWBOYS. ALIENS. If this film were a razor, it would have twelve blades, an Unobtanium handle, a cloaking device and an attachment which provoked shuddering orgasm in every woman within two miles. For a frantic, unashamed wet dream of a film, it’s quite watchable.

How many porn star biopics do we need?

Annie, get yer UFO blaster.

I know which one I’d rather be…

‘House’ star ends eight year marriage to Italian prince.

Tron Legacy, I feel for you. Why everyone is so surprised that you’ve turned out to be massively silly is beyond me. Tron was massively silly, and as we all know by now, the 00’s light-tastic apple never really falls far from the 80s synth tree. Hopelessly beautiful to look at, 3D-licious and utterly bonkers, there’s a lot to enjoy in this sexed-up sequel. Just as soon as you stop worrying about what on earth is going on.

When we last left TV’s favourite unhinged doctor, he’d been indirectly responsible for the death of his only friend Wilson’s girlfriend and new-school team member Thirteen had discovered she had Huntington’s Disease. Despite some early uneasiness while these plot issues resolve themselves, season five generally continues the hit show’s original formula with entertaining success. There’s a darker edge to this season, however, as the real House behind the sarcastic quips is discovered in depth.